Ghosting & Why it Impacts Us More than We Would Like to Admit
You are seeing someone. You have been on a few dates. You have been texting and communicating. Things are going well until suddenly one day you stop hearing from them. Your mind starts racing. Was it me? Did I do something wrong? You give it a few days, perhaps a few weeks. You try to give them the benefit of the doubt, and then it hits you that you have been ghosted.
Unfortunately, being ghosted is common in today’s culture, and it can happen in various types of relationships, not only romantic ones. Being ghosted is painful. Ghosting can trigger deep attachment wounds, fears of abandonment, feelings or beliefs of not being enough or perhaps being “too much.” It triggers and hits that deep wound and core belief that we are perhaps unloveable, unworthy, alone. It makes us doubt, ask questions of our actions and/or our character. Some may review old conversations, messages - checking, ruminating on past interactions.
Being ghosted can trigger strong feelings. But, when we let ourselves feel and curious about what we are feeling, we can better get to the source of what this is really about and tend to those deep wounds.
How to move forward when you’ve been ghosted?
Sit with and be curious about your feelings and begin to address what relational wounds this is triggering. Consider and think about other experiences where you may have had a similar feeling.
Surround yourself with your loved ones and biggest advocates.
When we get ghosted our self esteem can take a hit. Remind yourself of your accomplishments and/or things you are proud of!
Choose yourself. Lean into hobbies, interests, things you enjoy! Most importantly take care of yourself, starting with your most basic needs.